Stephen Colbert had to take time out to tell folks who’ve been feenin’ all over Ted Bundy know it’s always a bad idea to fall in love with a serial killer.
NETFLIX has on its movie list the documentary titled Conversations with a Killer The Ted Bundy Tapes.
As Colbert perfectly describes it, “It’s the perfect Netflix show to binge if you love The Great British BAKE OFF but thought it lacked enough corpses.”
These loons who are feenin’ over Ted Bundy don’t understand that “serial killer” are the operative words here.
A person doesn’t become a serial killer by sitting on the couch, eating Doritos and subways all day while watching Bates Motel.
Serial killers get up and do. The do being killing. Take these two tweets that Colbert talked about:
"He was hot. I can’t believe I’m writing this about a serial killer.
"ted bundy was a serial killer but why is he so
"Oh, it’s true, He was smoking BECAUSE THEY GAVE HIM THE
ELECTRIC CHAIR FOR MURDERIING PEOPLE! STOP IT!"
shouted at camera number one.
Seeing that there are just too many people who aren’t letting that fact
get through to their skulls, Colbert decided he’d explain the mere absurdity
of their girl fanning over a serial killer who they think can model Giorgio cologne. Enter, Dick Nighttime.
Like Ted Bundy, Dick Nighttime doesn’t look like he wants to place folks into a forever nighttime.
Dick Nighttime has all of his teeth and a head full of brown hair. Dick is a clean shaven, tall, slender man who has a muscular build.
Dick has a nice, cozy pad which he shares with a cute dog who he gives human bones to.
But do y’all think the folks in Dick Nighttime’s fan club let the fact that he, like Ted Bundy, is a serial killer who loves to lure young girls in so he can kill them and then eat them? Unh-unh.
All these folks see is Dick, in the nighttime, in them like this one fella here who said this: “I mean yeah, I guess they were like a bunch of young women with brown hair. But honestly, none of them weren’t even that hot so I wouldn’t even focus on it… Unfortunately, he never actually showed up to court naked but I did make a sketch of what that would look like. And that’s me right there.”
Humans, they don’t know any better.