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 Entertainment Archive 2016

The cleaning crew's naughty Christmas Carols kept a group of workers from going home
by Nathan'ette Burdine: December 18, 2016

It’s late at night, almost 10 o’clock. You look up and see that one office light on in the building.

And in that one office with that one light on in the building are a dedicated group of people waiting for the cleaning crew to finish their naughty Christmas Carols so they can go home.

On Saturday Night Live , Leslie Mann, Emma Stone, and Cicely Young were the cleaning crew holding up everyone in the office with their naughty Christmas Carols.

The manager, played by Beck Bennett, didn’t help the situation. He told everyone that their two week Christmas vacation would be placed on hold so that the cleaning crew could serenade them with their singing.

Needless to say, this didn’t go over too well with the workers who just wanted to get home and begin their two week Christmas vacation.

One worker, played by Pete Davidson , said to the manager, “Really and they wanna do it now.” Alex Moffat , who played one weekend dad Dan, added his two cents with, “I was hoping to catch the nine o’clock train.”

Sensing the un-un vibe and how non-appreciative the office folks are of their good cleaning, one of the cleaning ladies, played by Cicely Young, replied, “Oh, oh, I’m so sorry. We can just clean your mess and say or do nothing.”

Nonsense! Everyone wants to hear naughty Christmas Carols! Especially Christmas Carols that only grown folks can listen to!

Or, as Christine put it, “Of course we will stay and watch your show. You do so much for us!”

After getting the go ahead, the ladies took off their cleaning uniforms and begin the night with “Bad Boy, Santa:”
                    "Hey there Santa, you been a bad boy. Like you

                    do, like you do, like you always damn do. You came

                    down the chimney and you push me on the floor. What

                    he do? What he do? What did Santa do to you? Santa

                    said, ‘Be quiet as a mouse. Don’t tell anybody or I’ll

                    burn down your house. Bad boy Santa, bad boy Santa,

                    Santa’s a bad, bad boy!"

Everybody sat with a look of “what the?!” on their faces. The cleaning ladies, however, decided that the office folks had the problem because they obviously don’t know who Santa Claus is.

Leslie Jones reminded them that ol’ Saint Nick is the one who “stand in your house and he go ho, ho, ho.”

And just to be sure that the office folks know who ol’ Saint Nick really is, the cleaning ladies decided to add extra sugar onto this cookie by singing a naughtier Christmas Carol: “Santa, NO! What did I say, ‘Put on your pants and get back in your sleigh. Santa, Santa, Santa just make it fast.”

I don't know if “Santa made it fast” or not, but I do know that Moffat’s children, who he gets once every month, were surprised by how 2 Live Crew Nasty Santa could get. Moffat’s ex-wife Karla told po ol’ Moffat there, “This isn’t great Dan.”

Great, it was not. The office light was still on and naughty Santa Christmas Songs were preventing everyone from going home.

Bennett didn’t help the situation. He told the ladies that they needed to sing “one more” song just “to make sure” they’ve “all had enough” of this special Santa So Nasty, and horny all the time show. Po’ ol’ Davidson there, who at this point was as worn out as a pair of Walmart socks, protested in vain, “But they didn’t ask to do one more.”

The ladies didn’t care, though. They were bound and determined to teach these folks about the real Santa.

So they sang another little nasty tune that went a little something like this, “Santa told the elves they could have a turn. Bad boy Santa you never learn. Give me a break, put the camera away. Plus I think you’re too drunk anyway. Santa, Santa, Santa what did I tell you about my chimney, it only goes one way.”

Even after all of this nastiness, Bennet decided that the ladies needed to sing about “two or three more” songs before they all went home.

Cheesing from one ear to the other, Emma Stone tells him, “Ok, but this next one is a little bit dirtier.” Yeah, that one office light is going to be on for quite a while.

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