Nathan'ette Burdine's The Nyle Magazine

  News     Politics       Entertainment      Under the Radar      Double-Talking            

 Politics Archive 2018

Hm, Michael Cohen needs a lawyer
by Nathan'ette Burdine: April 5, 2018

You know you’re in trouble when your lawyer needs a lawyer. Michael Cohen has found himself so knee deep in hot shit to the point that he has had to find money from somewhere in order to hire himself a lawyer by the name of David Schwartz.

Cohen got himself into this fix after he decided he’d switch roles with Donald John and become the client.

Just 11-days out from the 2016 Presidential Election, Cohen put up his house in order to get a $130,000 plus loan to pay hush money to porn star Stormy Daniels who allegedly had a sexual relationship with Donald John when she was 27 and he was 60.

When asked why he did such foolishness, Cohen responded, “I did what any lawyer would do for his high profile client.”

Welp…now…Daniels doesn’t want to hush up about her alleged sexual relationship with Donald John.

Stormy Daniels and her lawyer, Michael Avenatti , have been tweeting about it on the Twitter and talking to CNN’s Anderson Cooper.

During the 60 Minutes interview with Cooper, Daniels said she had sex with Donald John after she came out of the bathroom.

“I asked him if I could use his restroom and he said, ‘Yes, you know, it’s through those—through the bedroom, you’ll see it.’ So I- - I excused myself and I went to the - - the restroom. You know, I was I there for a little bit and came out and he was sitting, you know, on the edge of the bed when I walked out, perched,” is what Daniels told Cooper. Mm-hmm, that’s what she said.

Cohen has been telling folks that Daniels is a lie and he’s going to get the court to fine her $1 million every time she talks about that “sexual relationship” he paid her $130,000 not to talk about.

Avenatti told Cohen that two can play that game. So Avenatti turned around and hit Cohen with a defamation lawsuit, citing the $130,000 hush money payment as evidence that there is evidence that Daniels did the do with Donald John.

Avenatti was like, “Take that suckaaa!” And Cohen was like, “I don’t wanna take that. Here, you (Schwartz) take that.” Schwartz took it. He then looked at Cohen and was like, “Ok, this is the game plan. You say nothing and I say something.”

Cohen nodded his head in agreement and went on his merry way. Schwartz then grabbed his phone and called Anderson Cooper who told him to come on his show.

Cooper was like, “Yeah, yeah, yeah! Come on over, everyone is going to be here! Michael Avenatti will be here. Jeffrey Toobin will be here. I’ll be here. You’ll be here. It’ll be fun. Come on!” Schwartz said, “Ok,” and then headed over to CNN.

Meanwhile, Cohen is locked up in the basement in his home that he put up so he could get that $130,000 hush money to hush Daniels.

He’s sitting there in the dark with his knees pressed up against his chest, biting his nails, and watching the interview with the sound set on mute. A call comes in. It’s Donald John! 

    “Hey Mikey, are you watching this?! You’re watching this! I mean,
    Schwartz is great. He really has Stormy’s lawyer on the ropes
    there. I mean, I’m loving this. Are you loving this?! I’m loving this
    The and/or. You gotta read the fine print. David Dennison never
    signed my name. Hahaha! Hey, Mikey, I just realized something.
    David Dennison, double D’s, Stormy Daniels has double D’s. Ironic,
    hey! Don’t worry Mikey. You’re off the ropes for now. David
    Dennison, I love me!”

Unfortunately for Mikey, he’s still on the ropes because he decided to do the one thing lawyers should never do which is to become their client’s client.

I also hear tell Mikey got Daniel’s former lawyer, Keith Davidson, to go on CNN to clear his name about that $130,000 payment Mikey paid Daniels in order to hush her up about her alleged affair with ol’ Donald John there.

CNN quoted Davidson as saying, “He (Michael “Mikey” Cohen) suggested that it would be appropriate for me to go out into the media and spill my guts.”

Davidson, however, can’t “spill” his “guts” to the media folks because the lawyer-client privilege prevents Davidson from telling whatever Mikey boy allegedly wants him to tell about the Daniels-Donald John affair.

Oh well, sucks for Mikey boooyyy!!! Ha!

comments powered by Disqus