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The Tweet of God

The Tweet Of God's Twitter Avatar 

Twitter took almost eight years to
realize that God has a Twitter page
by Nathan'ette Burdine: September 18, 2018

They finally did it! It took them eight years, but they did it. Twitter has finally recognized God’s Twitter page, @TheTweetOfGod.

And being the “geniuses” that they are, the Twitter folks tried to be funny with God Almighty by asking Him to tell them why He chose @TheTweetOfGod as his Twitter handle.

God, being the superior being He is, hit those Twitter “geniuses” back with a two word answer, “I’m God.”

Hahaha, take that Jack Dorsey! You don’t fix your lips to ask God why He chose the Twitter handle that He did.

HE’S GOD! He can choose any Twitter handle that He wants. Hell, there would be no Twitter if it wasn’t for God staying up for six days and six nights and then resting on the seventh day to make this Earthly plane that we humans call our home.

Yup, I hate to be the bearer of bad news but you, Jack Dorsey, and your little Twitter minions are nothing but humans.

Y’all better recognize who’s the master. Hint, it ain’t Sho’ Nuff! It’s God. He got the glow and the power.

Y’all Twitter devils ain’t got no power. Y’all ain’t nothing but humans who are limited by y’all’s humanity.

Now…I know… y’all Twitter folks want folks to believe that y’all are gods because of the lil’ algorithms y’all have written in order to make the Twitter.

Y’all Twitter folks want folks to believe y’all know every single thing about everybody.

But y’all see, those algorithms can only do so much and are bound to have several errors.

And the “so much” the algorithms can only do and the “several errors” the algorithms “are bound to have” is due to the fact that it is a human who is writing the code to track all the goings on on the Twitter platform.

That’s right folks! Twitter doesn’t know everything that they want y’all to think they know.

Twitter doesn’t know what y’all are doing if y’all don’t have a computerize device on y’all’s person that will tell the Twitter folks all of y’all’s business.

Those algorithms won’t show the Twitter folks that y’all are over there at Ms. Johnson’s house if y’all don’t take one of y’all’s human made computerize devices that has an algorithm tracking y’all over there at Ms. Johnson’s house.

Like I said, “Those algorithms can only do so much.” And the algorithms “can only do so much” because the algorithms are finite and fallible, just like the humans who wrote the algorithms.

God, on the other hand, is infinite and infallible. He knows all of the goings on before they go on.

God doesn’t need algorithms and a computer to know what y’all are who y’all are doing or where y’all are doing who or what y’all are doing.

All God needs is Himself in order to know what is going on with y’all. Jack Dorsey and his Twitter crew, however, unh-unh.

They need a whole lot to occur in order for them to get an idea of what’s going on with y’all.

Hell, that’s why they ignored God on the Twitter for almost eight years because they want us to see them as the gods who we should depend on for likes, retweets, and gummy drop replies.

Now…I know there are those of you who will ask, “Why is God on the Twitter if He’s the shitz with the giggles?!”

Well, God is progressive. Long gone are the days of the Old and New Testaments. God’s all about the Modern Testament.

He wants to communicate directly with His creation. And what better way to do that than to go to the places where His creations are communicating with each other.

Mind you, all of that doesn’t mean that the Twitter folks are all that and then some.

It just means God is open to being a part of His creation’s lives; unlike His two other children Jesus and Lucifer.

However, those are other stories. Y’all get the point, though. Those Twitter devils want to be gods.

That’s why they let y’all use their little platform for free. It’s a way to track everything that y’all are doing, get y’all to buy more impressions, followers, tweets, and other stuff so y’all can feel good about y’all selves.

But like I said, “The Twitter folks are humans whose humanity makes them fallible to the point that they are bound to fuck up.”

Therefore, I really believe the real reason why Jack Dorsey and his Twitter crew didn’t recognize God’s @TheTweetOfGod Twitter handle for almost eight years is because they are mad that their algorithms can’t make them what God is, which is a god. Oh well, sucks for them!

Oh, before I forget, Justin Bieber is the one human God follows. Justin Bieber is the son God wanted Jesus and Lucifer to be. 


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